When someone doesn’t want to talk about something, they avoid you. They avoid subjects that have a personal condition to them and they don’t like the feeling they get when faced with this issue. Therefore, the solution to the problem doesn’t get resolved.
Most people live in a world that doesn’t exist either because they are disillusioned by the happiness that is fake. You see, I have learned over the years that people do not want to be around negative people because they don’t know how to act around them. They feel this energy so dearly because they have their own demons, the ones they have not dealt with and that makes them fake.
I used to love to watch and interact with people everywhere; it gave me lots to write about but now, working from home, I don’t have that luxury of being around people all the time. I met a nice lady yesterday who was very interested in my line of work and well, I guess I made a new friend. Maybe.
The negative me sits here and thinks: “will she remember who I am? will she reach as she said? I think not. Most people say things at the moment just to get you out of their face or if they want something. Then, you are just a name on a piece of paper that you can then be shredded for life. I was proud of myself for a moment yesterday, I had to go pass a very important 3-part test and to my surprise, I did without the help of anyone or anything to guide me. It is amazing what a brain can remember over time and well, this test was important. It has the word “validation” on it and for me it meant something. Now, I can close that box for another 5 years and remind myself that I really don’t need others to do things that matter. Although that license will never be used again, I still think it is a proud moment.
So what next: I am still searching for more ideas, finding ways to make money and hoping for a miracle as they say in order to go away this winter. My frustrations have not subsided and the shop isn’t going as well as I expected still.
What the hell do people want firfucksakes?